Site Updates

A Change of ❤️

| Ben

I have been thinking, which is usually a dangerous thing. I said earlier that I was going to stop updating this thing but find that is probably not the very best solution to all my life’s issues. Sure, I post little blips and burps on Mastodon a lot more frequently, but the character limit is a little restrictive. What I mean by that is that I don’t want to have to post 10 toots in a row to get my thought across if I don’t have to. So, I guess I’ll put those longer thoughts here.

I think a lot of my issue is that I want to escape my issues so by ignoring it, I thought maybe it will just go away. I don’t want to come on to the internet and seem to be a chronic complainer. You know, like the people who know that a disease exists, they have it or they’re on their way to getting it. I am admittedly sick… a lot. I feel like that’s all I complain about sometimes. Can I overcome that and inject some positivity into my life through regular writing? Who the hell knows. I can barely string along sentences anymore. Ha ha.

So, here I am. And I guess I’ll keep this up until I get tired of oversharing. Maybe at some point, I can talk about the positive things in my life.

Right now, I am just recovering from COVID (AGAIN!!!). I am okay though. I feel like garbage, but also nearing the end of my study and research. Sometimes, I just sit and wait for the bad stuff to happen, but hey, I’m alive. And damn it, I will finish this degree!!!

Diminished Returns

| Ben

Look at what the cat dragged in. (That would be me.)

It’s been a long time, hasn’t it? I have been incredibly busy doing lots of things but they’re all things that are boring and mundane.

I haven’t really been that social as of late and it’s not that I’m depressed or sad, it’s simply because posting my business all the time for strangers to see and podcasting about the most boring-ass shit isn’t a priority anymore. I’m a bit happier from it.

I do have the sad news to report that this is probably all that will be posted here. I just don’t have any interest in it anymore. I feel like my online life has been fun, but it’s just time to step away and further fade into obscurity and blend into the shadows. (30 Nov 2025: So apparently, that didn’t age very well… read this.)

If you’ve been here for years and popped in to check in on me, thanks. I appreciate it. Honestly, I do. Thanks for the support and care you’ve given me over the past couple of decades. 🙂 I wish you all well and I hope that you have everything in your life that you have always wanted. We may meet again in some time at some unexpected place.

Until then, thanks again! 🙂

The Inevitable End

| Ben

Shifting Priorities

Over the past few years, my priorities have shifted from web and media development to my other career. This other job keeps me away from the computer and is physically and mentally demanding. With the purchase of land and a house, I’ve had less free time to spend here.

I’ve also had a personal website since 1998. I’ve shared and overshared with the general public too long. I am older and wiser now and sharing private aspects of my life is no longer necessary. It’s also not very interesting. My life is, in a word, mundane. No one cares. (It’s okay. I wouldn’t care either if I was a stranger peeking in.)

Podcasting and Stuff

It’s been hard to maintain my podcast. I would keep making plans to record, and when the day would come, I would find something else to do with my time. Instead of telling myself that I am going to record, I am going to be realistic and say that I am officially cancelling my podcast.

You may find that the feed (if you’re subscribed via Apple Podcasts or Google Podcasts) is no longer available. Old episodes will be removed at some point. We’ll pretend like they didn’t exist.

Streaming

That didn’t work from day one and I had a feeling that it wouldn’t. I’m not planning to stream on a regular schedule. I may do it, but it will be unannounced and will only happen when I have free time.

Online Presence

I am not disappearing but I am not going out of my way to promote myself or to overshare on this weblog. People who want to stay in contact with me are encouraged to do so, but I won’t force you.

My online business will live on. I need to have websites and stuff. Web domain registrations are relatively cheap so I’ll be around. I need to keep my technology skills sharp, so here I will remain.

Chatting and Messaging

I haven’t been chatty for a long time. Many friends complain that I don’t talk to them. If you understood what kind of job I had, you’d understand that my time alone is very precious and extremely necessary. Typing is annoying, but if you want to try your luck, find me on Telegram.

Social Media

I hate Twitter. I hate Facebook (but it’s a necessary evil for close friends and family). I hate Tik Tok. I hate Instagram. It doesn’t leave much choice, does it?

I do post on Mastodon.

Things Do Change and Things WILL Change

I’m forever going to be interested in technology. That will never change.

I don’t know what’s going to happen. I don’t know if there will never be another podcast or if I’ll miraculously start trusting social media again. Who knows?

General Housekeeping

In case you had an account here, it has been removed. Your login is no longer needed or necessary. You should have received an email about it. If you didn’t, take a closer look in your mailbox.

Redirection links (Cnoi.se links) will no longer work.

Into the Future

Updating this weblog is no longer a priority for me. If you’re curious about what’s happening, follow me on Mastodon. As I said above, things may change. It’s hard for me to stay away from the web because as I’ve said numerous times: this is a therapy for me. Coding helps me forget about my problems, but it can also cause additional problems, such as things never being completely finished. I want to stay away from that as much as I can and focus my time and life on taking care of myself and my wonderful husband.

Until we meet again (or when I need therapy), take care of yourselves!

Ben

The Podcast Episode That Couldn’t

| Ben

They’re just not happening, are they?

I had recorded an episode while driving back home the other day, and it sounded like I was recording it 5 rooms away so I have to cancel that one too. One of these days, I’ll get around to publishing new content. I’m time-constrained right now, so it’ll come when it does. Maybe next time I will check to see whether it sounds terrible before I talk to myself for 30 minutes.

See you soon?

July Brings New Podcast Episodes

| Ben

UPDATE: Yeah, that didn’t happen. This podcast episode will probably be scrapped. I haven’t had the time and/or energy to edit it and all that. I’m going to try to get one out (re-recorded or not) this month.

I’ve started recording podcast episodes again. Still, I am not committing to a set schedule, but I thought that I would record while I drive from place to place. I feel as if this makes the time pass a little faster and helps me formulate and process the thoughts I have in my head. I recorded in mid-June and thought I would post the whole thing at once, but my recording ended up being over 1.5 hours, so I will slice it into two parts.

For those with an account, you can listen about 3-5 days early. I had planned to upload the first on 1 July, but that will be moved to next week due to some unexpected health issues. They’ll need a bit of editing.

To see general information about these new episodes, go to https://cnoi.se/ or https://www.complicatednoise.com/ and make your way to the podcast section.

I am going to try to post at least a monthly podcast episode. We’ll see.

Trimming Things Down

| Ben

Hello, all.

A few changes are coming. And I am under a huge amount of stress. And I might be a little crazy. (But that’s okay… and expected.)

Removing Twitter Integration

Celebrate, for this is the last Twitter notification for a new post at my weblog! I don’t read my Twitter feed anymore. I don’t even post anything anymore except the odd complaint about how tired and exhausted I am. You’re saved.

Having said that though, it would be responsible of me to let you know that you can follow my boring antics at Mastodon. At least I know Mastodon doesn’t make it their business model to follow me around on the Internet.

Removing Telegram Integration Too

Does anybody even realise that this is a thing? No? Okay, then.

Also, this will be the last notification at Telegram because blog posts are becoming so rare–what’s the point?

There will be no more updates being sent to the chatroom and I am thinking that chatroom probably won’t be around very long either…

New Podcast Episodes? No Thanks.

I have no plans right now to record. I’m just not interested right now. Now, if something changes somehow by a miracle, I might start again. I guess this isn’t the end of it, but damn it, it’s close.

Website Redesign… Slowly

Most of my website revolves around regularly updating my podcast which hasn’t happened since October 2021. I will do a bit of work here and there to defocus the podcast component.

As I’ve mentioned in passing, I don’t know whether I will continue all of this next year.

Why Is This F***ing Happening

The past several months have been brutal at times. My calendar of events has turned into a mess of “go to work, go home, travel for 4 hours, go to work at another job, stay with my partner, travel 4 hours, and go home” then rinse and repeat. It’s exhausting and I’m struggling to cope at times. If I can stop stressing over stuff that doesn’t matter (like podcasting), I will have some time to sit back and unwind.

It’s so hard to relax and I don’t think that this post really reflects my feelings. I am back to being on edge again. That’s not a good thing. At the end of the day, my mental health is most important. I am not sorry. I am tired of being afraid to say “no”. I’m just over it.

If you do want to stay in touch, you can message me via Telegram, message me through my site or follow me with Mastodon. I am not disappearing because I am “too busy”. I’m just removing a lot of the BS in my life right now. Podcasting and talking about my problems with myself or others no longer has a therapeutic effect for me. I am tackling it on my own with a better mindset and it’s been the only thing that hasn’t pulled me down a hole of self-loathing and sadness. I am okay. I just need to chill the fuck out a bit.

See you around? I hope so!

Today’s Podcast Episode is Cancelled

| Ben

I didn’t know where I should post this, so I am posting it here. Podcasting hasn’t really been a priority for me lately, so I have cancelled my next planned podcast episode. That means that will try really hard to care enough to do another one before the end of the year. We will see whether that happens or not.

Moving to my own space that I don’t depend on my partner to share costs makes money a bit tight, so I’ve had to work a bit more. Working more makes me more tired and of course that makes me care a lot less. My hosting costs have gone up around 33% as well, so believe me, I have thought about abandoning everything. I decided against it because this is my therapy. Believe me, right now I need this more than I have needed it in years.

In the upcoming year, I want to focus less on podcasting and more on my other projects. I’ve also made the decision to wind down my IT consulting. I have this problem of wanting to do too many things at the same time, so I am stepping back in hopes that it will improve my mental health. It’s having a bit of a rough run right now, and instead of letting things get bad, I thought maybe I should try to enjoy living a bit more. It’s hard to do when you’re spending most of your time at work. Of course, if you love what you do, that’s good, right?

I like what I do. I don’t always love it, but I am happy with what I’m doing now. I’ve had a week off and heading back tomorrow.

Didn’t I just say that I needed to work more? Yes. I am working all my required hours in one clump, and then “relaxing” later. I am not broke. I am not having money problems, but my partner regularly informs me that we’re building a house next year and gets angry every time I think about doing anything for myself.

Oh well.

So this is a little bit of what I would have put in a podcast episode. Some people don’t like to read. I don’t blame you. And right now, I’m sick of hearing about peoples’ problems.

I’m gonna go for now. I am also rewriting the code to my website. It looks similar, but quite a lot is being removed… mostly code is being removed that isn’t optimised or is not being used. Whatever makes it function better. New media player. New feedback options. That kind of thing.

I’m outta here. Take care of yourselves.

My Online Presence Sleeps

| Ben

It’s been a busy few weeks for me and a lot has been going on. I can assure you that I’m not sleeping but my website, podcast, and weblog have been.

I’ve been working a lot more and haven’t felt like sharing much. You know something though?

That’s okay.

Sometimes when people get busy and overwhelmed, they need to take a step back and ask themselves whether the stress is worth it. Remember folks, stress can completely mess up good health. It’s just aren’t worth it. I’ve been getting migraines again which is no good.

I love sharing aspects of my life with you and playing around with technology. I do these things to keep my technology knowledge fresh. But at the same time I am not interested in overdoing it. I know when I need to relax a bit.

I am not disappearing. If I don’t update here, I’m possibly updating somewhere else like on Mastodon or Twitter. Sitting down recording myself talking isn’t a priority now nor is writing my complaints about small things.

I am just stepping back to ensure myself and others that I can prioritise my health. This may be a short little break or one that lasts a few months. I just don’t know. When I figure it out though, I’ll be here.

I appreciate you caring enough to read this. Seriously I do, and it’s people like you that make life good for me. That’s why I won’t disappear.

Having said that, I am going to be doing some behind the scenes code changes at my website to get rid of unnecessary code. Efficiency. That’s my aim.

Anyway, thanks. I’ll see you around.

Episode Upload Shuffle

| Ben

This is just a courtesy message to let you know that I will be moving my usual podcast episode update day from Friday to Tuesday (starting with #60). I’m not getting many Fridays and weekends off right now and I tend to be off more on Tuesdays so this makes more sense.

I don’t think that it’ll make much of a difference to your daily life.

I am perpetually tired. That is all.

Behind the Scenes

| Ben

Hello everyone. This is just a quick little update on what’s happening with my projects! (Mostly website-related.)

Dropping ReCaptcha and Replacing It With hCaptcha

I am dropping ReCaptcha in favor of hCaptcha because I’ve discovered that ReCaptcha has a nasty habit of tracking you. That’s typical of Google products, so I’m replacing it with a system that’s similar but will present you with a similar “choose the pictures” verification. The good thing is that for each qualified verification earns money. 100% of all the money that will be raised on my website by hCaptcha will go directly to the WikiMedia Foundation.

I’m also going to move the fonts I use to my server instead of relying on a link to Google.

You can actually avoid all the tracking stuff by using another browser such as Brave or Ghostery.

Menu and Side Panel Rewrite

You probably can’t tell, but on Complicated Noise, I’ve rewritten the menu serving code. Everything looks the same right now, but I’m going to make things a little simpler in the future. If you have issues, please let me know.

Contact Form Rewrite (in progress)

My registration system is going to start handling messages sent to me by the website. Again, you’ll notice a new form, but everything will work the way it’s supposed to.

Native file attaching will be supported this time around. They’ll still be scanned for nasties though.

New Music Available

Have an account and want to listen to ambient music? You’ll see it in the podcast guide in the bonus section. “Beach Fingers” has appeared with “Visible Form” coming sometime within the next few months.

You’ll have to have an account to listen to the early stuff. It’s not available to anybody else right now.

I’m also making a new section to my website with links to the stuff that won’t require an account, but for now, the bonuses do require a free account.

Shortcutting: Cnoi.se

| Ben

I should really think about domains before I actually register them. I’m adding a new one to our little family: cnoi.se.

I’m not moving everything or starting over, but will be working on using that to make URLs a lot shorter. The only one that works at the moment is just by going to cnoi.se to go to the regular website.

It’s only been a few hours since I’ve registered it so it’s not going to work for everybody just yet. It will though, eventually.

That’s my short little announcement for now.

Oh, and it’s not a way to track anybody, it’s just to save time and I guess to experiment a bit.

Hope you’re well!

Podcast Episode Blackout

| Ben
Airplane on outdoors graphic - i'll be back

Hey there everybody. This weblog hasn’t got the traffic that my other one had, but I just wanted to mention that I am going to be away for the next few weeks (starting this weekend) which means that I won’t be posting new podcast episodes until I am back home. That’ll be the second week of September.

I’m not traveling by plane or anything, but just have to be in another city to complete some regular training for my job.

I’ll try to post here, but have a few busy weeks ahead.

Update: A new podcast episode has been uploaded. No Great Shakes, is available now. Once I am back, I will get back to recording and posting!

As always, I hope everyone is well!